This is a response to Friendship Has its Limits by Erin Biba. The article is basically about how our social interactions have changed and become more impersonal because of “friending” via Facebook and internet. The studies that were mentioned in the article said that it was not possible to maintain a relationship with more than 150 people at one time. These studies most probably had been conducted and proven upon a median or average. It is my belief that this is wrong, I believe you can have over 150 close friends and that your friend count on facebook can be accurate.
The average person gets up in the morning, eats breakfast, and goes to work. They will see their family, neighbors, and possibly a clerk or someone at a coffee shop on the way. At work they see the same co-workers, a lot of the time same customers, and then leave for home. My point is the average person sees a lot of the same people every day and is one of the reasons people can become pretty bored with their life or the routine of things. If you were to now ask this person if they had 150 close friends, the answer would most probably be no. does this person have a friend count of 150 or higher on Facebook? Probably, but that is one person in an average survey.
Let’s take a look at a pro soccer player. My friend Emir Bajrami plays professional soccer in Europe and I’ve known him since I was a kid. His friend count is currently 3,428. Does he have 3,428 close friends he can call on a whim? I don’t think so. Does he however, have 150? I would most definitely have to say yes. People that do a lot of things, go to a lot of places tend to meet and start relationships with a lot more people, common sense. I myself have played hockey on five different teams in the last two and a half years. That alone is 125 teammates combined between the teams. Can I call anyone of these 125 guys up and have a heart to heart, or ask for a place to stay when I am in town? Absolutely yes! I spend every day for months with my teammates and develop a very close relationship with each and every one of them. That is one of the things that bring a team together. I would definitely consider all of these guys close friends of mine.
It is definitely true that I have a closer relationship with a few very close friends and I do not talk to 150 friend’s everyday day. If that is what constitutes having a close friend then I can’t say I have any. There is a very large grey area as to what you can consider a close friend though. In the text Erin Biba says, “Your real friend would call you in tears to pick her up from a car accident”. Does this define who a close friend is? If so I definitely have over 150 close friends, and I am pretty sure there are more people out there that do as well.
To me a close friend is someone you feel very comfortable with and you always have a good time with this person. You can tell them anything without them judging you or ridiculing you, they are someone who will always have your back, and they can take your mind of stuff, and relax you. I would agree that not everyone has an accurate friend count on Facebook but that kind of is what Facebook is about too though, connecting with people from your past. It is possible to maintain a relationship with more than 150 people at once? Call me naive, but I believe one hundred percent yes! It is possible, and it is equally possible that someone’s friend count is true to the number.
